COMPARISON = FAILURE

Recently I was on a plane sitting next to a former collegiate football player. We started talking about CrossFit and sports in general. I was telling him about the CrossFit Games, and how I wished that I was as good as the women who compete at that level. My new friend said something that has stuck with me ever since: Comparing yourself to others will always lead to failure. Think about the truth in that statement. 

I am not talking about the feelings you have when you see someone doing something well and you are inspired or want to emulate them. I am talking about when you compare yourself to someone in a way that makes you feel inferior to him or her and leaves you feeling bad about yourself. This is a sure-fire way to set yourself up for failure. You are no longer thinking about what you CAN do but what you CAN’T do.

This past week, one of my athletes who has been training with me for about three months told me she didn’t think she was as strong as she should be. She said she thought she should be as strong as me, someone who has been doing CrossFit for over three years.

I can relate to her feelings. In my old gym, we had some really strong women. Most of us had all started CrossFit at the same time. I remember how I used to lift on the same platform with a group of girls, but as they made huge progress on their lifts, I fell behind and eventually had to move to another platform. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to get stronger. My body just would not gain strength at the same pace as them.

I was amazed at these girls, but at the same time, all I did was compare myself to them. Why wasn’t I getting new PRs like them? Why couldn’t I do the workout prescribed like them? I knew I had different strengths in the gym. Give me a chipper or bodyweight workout, and I’d give you a run for your money. But instead of appreciating what I was good at, all I did was beat myself up for not being strong enough. It got in my head, and truthfully, it held me back. I went into every strength session thinking about what I couldn’t do. You can’t be successful with that mindset.

The face of a new PR. I think it was the shirt…

After talking to my athlete this week, I pulled out my old workout book that I started keeping after seven months into CrossFit. I have to admit, it was embarrassing. I was cleaning 65 pounds, deadlifting 115 pounds, and push pressing 75 pounds. Almost three years later, I am cleaning 135 pounds, deadlifting 225 pounds, and push pressing 125 pounds.

As I did a side-by-side comparison, I thought about all the hours I had spent in the gym to reach those numbers. They represented a lot of time (three years!) and a lot of hard work. Seeing those numbers next to each other, made me feel kind of proud. I knew that I had fought for every new PR to get to where I am today. My current numbers may not be where I would like them to be, but something tells me they never will be!

Most of the time, we are the ones to blame for not reaching our goals. Stop comparing yourself to others, and focus on what YOU can do to achieve your goal. Nothing can stop you when you simply believe in yourself.